Chapter 1

My mom, Brenda, has kleptomania. She just can't resist stealing.

But she's terrified of getting caught, so she's always used me as her scapegoat.

When I was little, she'd stuff candies from the grocery store into my pockets.

When the clerk caught us, she'd immediately turn on me: "Are you that greedy? I'll stitch your mouth shut when we get home!"

When I was older, Mom took me to a friend's house.

She quietly pocketed my friend's iPhone.

Once it was discovered, she burst into tears, screaming, "How could you steal again?! How did I end up with a daughter like you!"

At my wedding, Mom stole my mother-in-law's gold necklace.

When it was found, she declared she was disowning me on the spot: "Your husband gave you a million dollars for a wedding gift, and you still stole a gold necklace?! You've disappointed me so much!"

The video of that scene went viral, and everyone online called me a thief.

In utter despair, I jumped into a river.

When I opened my eyes again, I was back to the moment Mom first accused me of stealing candy.

I blinked my innocent, big eyes and said in a tiny voice, "Mommy, you were the one who put the candy in my pocket. Why do you insist I put it there myself?"