Chapter 4

The doctor came to check on me, frowning when he saw I was alone. "You need to call a family member to stay with you," he said sternly.

My parents had passed away years ago. Vanessa was all I had.

I called her again. This time, her phone was off.

I laughed bitterly to myself.

What was I expecting? Ethan was back. Of course she didn't care.

So I called Ryan Hale, my oldest friend.

He arrived not long after, stopping short when he saw me. "Rowan? Jesus, you look terrible."

One sleepless night had left me pale and hollow-eyed.

"Where's Vanessa? You're in the hospital, and she's not here? What kind of wife does that? She's got you wrapped around her finger, man."

I stared at him, his anger echoing my own thoughts. Maybe he was right. My love—my blind devotion—had only made it easier for her to hurt me.

I took a steady breath. "Ethan's back."

Ryan froze, the apple he'd been peeling forgotten in his hand. "That bastard came back?"

"I think I'm going to file for divorce."

Ryan's face shifted, his mouth opening as if to say something, but he stopped. Finally, he muttered, "Maybe that's for the best."

I already knew it was.

I'd known for years that Vanessa never let Ethan go.

Once, I'd brought her a coat she forgot at home. I found her at a friend's gathering, and as I reached the door, I overheard her friend's voice.

"You're married to Rowan, but you're still hung up on Ethan?"

Vanessa's voice had been calm, almost cold. "It's different. Ethan is Ethan. I'll never forget him. Rowan? He's just what I settled for."

I stood there, frozen, though I wore layers to keep out the cold.

But nothing had ever felt so cold as that moment.

That was when I knew—I would never be enough.