Chapter 1

I chased after Ethan Sinclair for five years. I drank on his behalf until I had a stomach hemorrhage, attended social events for him until I was covered in the world's grime.

Yet he called me dirty, tore apart my mother's keepsake in public while holding his new lover, and treated me like a dog that came running at his beck and call.

I turned around and married Mason Westwood, the man rumored to be uninterested in women.

It wasn't until Ethan knelt in the snow, begging me to come back, that Mason kissed me in front of everyone.

"Get lost. She's mine now."

Joanna's POV

After pursuing Ethan for five years, I went from being the Brooks family heiress to becoming his most obedient servant.

Everyone was betting on when he'd get bored and throw me away.

When I stood at the private room door, soaked to the bone and clutching documents, I heard Ethan casually making fun of me to his friends.

"With rain this heavy, will Joanna even show up?"

"Why wouldn't she? Everyone in our circle knows she gave up being a wealthy heiress just to run around being Ethan's secretary."

"Joanna loves Ethan so much. Our boy Ethan's got serious charm."

Laughter erupted from the room, mixed with the sound of drinking.

Three hours earlier, Ethan had called me, asking me to find an important document.

His new girlfriend, Sienna Cunningham, had lost it, and he urgently needed me to save the day.

Without a second thought, I pulled out my IV, dragged my feverish body out to search through trash cans and review security footage for three hours.

After finally recovering it, I rushed to the club.

Just as I was about to knock, the conversation inside clearly reached my ears.

"Last time he just casually mentioned wanting toast from that place downtown, and she waited in line for five hours. By the time she delivered it, she nearly passed out."

"She's pathetically desperate."

A burst of laughter erupted, each laugh piercing my eardrums like needles.

My hand gripping the documents trembled slightly from how hard I was clenching.

That time buying toast, I really did pass out.

It was winter then too.

Ethan sent me a message in the middle of the night saying he was hungry and wanted toast from that shop.

I drove halfway across London to get it.

The shop was packed. I waited for five whole hours until my hands and feet went numb from the cold.

When I finally delivered the toast to him, he just glanced at it and frowned.

"I suddenly don't want it anymore."

He casually tossed it in the trash.

Later, I developed a high fever and collapsed at his doorstep.

When I woke up in the hospital, Ethan only visited once, his tone full of impatience.

"If your body can't handle it, don't push yourself. Who's to blame? Stop doing these self-indulgent things."

Back then, I was foolish. I thought it was his awkward way of showing concern.

I thought if I was good enough to him, one day he'd see my sincerity.

Now I understand.

He never valued my devotion.

The next second, his careless voice drifted from the room.

"Her?"

Ethan's voice carried a hint of drunkenness.

"She's just someone who comes when I call and leaves when I tell her to."

"As long as I crook my finger, even if I told her to crawl in here on her knees right now, she'd be willing."

"You've got real skills, training the Brooks family heir to be so obedient."

"Who doesn't know Joanna loves him like crazy? Without him, she can't survive."

The room filled with unrestrained laughter.

Standing at the door, I felt my blood run cold.

I drank on his behalf until stomach hemorrhaging sent me to emergency care while he celebrated another woman's birthday.

I cleaned up his messes, even giving up the opportunity to study at Cambridge, staying at his company like a workhorse.

To match his preferences, I suppressed all my edges and became gentle and accommodating.

I thought hearts were made of flesh.

I thought after five years of companionship, even a stone would warm up.

Tears fell on the back of my hand, but I didn't cry out loud.

Through the door crack, I glimpsed that man.

He still stood out in the crowd.

He was holding his new girlfriend, Sienna Cunningham, in his arms.

He lowered his head to feed her a drink, his expression lazy and indifferent.

Sienna nestled in his embrace, smiling brilliantly.

I looked at the documents in my hand and felt truly pathetic.

"Miss Brooks?"

A waiter's surprised voice came from behind me.

"Why aren't you going in? Mr. Sinclair and the others are all inside."

The waiter's voice wasn't quiet. The laughter in the room stopped abruptly.

Ethan's cold voice drifted out.

"Since you're here, why not come in?"

"I just finished drinking anyway. Drive me home."

The waiter looked at me sympathetically.

I took a deep breath and forced the stinging sensation in my eyes back down.

I turned and left, casually tossing those documents into a trash can.

Then I called my father.

My voice choked as I spoke.

"Dad, I've changed my mind. Arrange a marriage for me. Make it fast, or I'm afraid I'll regret it."

Silence lasted a few seconds on the other end before his voice came through.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure."

"Alright, I'll arrange it."

After hanging up, I wiped the tears from my face and strode into the rain.