Chapter 2

Early the next morning, Adam went to work.

After he left, I crawled out of bed and went to the study.

Among the full shelves of materials and classics was my diary.

I pulled out the diary, every page I turned was filled with my innermost thoughts, from meeting Adam to now.

In these years without Vivian, I felt the love I didn't have in my previous life.

Perhaps because I accompanied Adam through his low point, he treated me differently.

Although I knew Vivian was still in his heart.

Sometimes I would hesitate, thinking maybe this time would be different?

But then I would think of those six full years of companionship, only to be exchanged for Vivian's grand entrance, for Vivian wearing the wedding dress I had ordered, for them kissing amidst blessings on the day of my death.

I was driven nearly mad with hatred.

Adam must, like me, be tormented by overwhelming emotions day and night.

Tears fell on the diary, my hand caressing the photo I had taken that day.

Over and over again, cutting another wound on my heart.

I thought I wouldn't feel pain anymore.

"I went to pick up Adam and saw a girl kiss him. The girl was very happy, but I was very sad."

A brand new page, a few lines written in a flowing hand.

Excitement and depression occupied my emotions simultaneously.

It's strange, but somehow enjoyable.

I closed the diary and put it back in its original place.

I applied light makeup and wore a white dress.

The girl in the mirror looked serene and gentle.

Completely different from Vivian's glamour.

I raised the corners of my mouth, and the girl in the mirror made the same movement.

Shallow dimples like they were filled with honey.

Adam had complimented me long ago, saying I looked good when I smiled.

But I don't like to smile, not after coming back again.

I prefer crying now, crying hysterically makes me feel like I'm still alive, with vivid emotions, a person of flesh and blood.

It will make me always remember Adam's indifference and Vivian's provocation.